WHEN THINGS BREAK

Life happens…. things break… It’s easy to flip out when they do… We often place too much value on objects, on possessions, on things that in the greater scheme, don’t really matter…I am grateful to my mom for so many of the wisdoms she taught me as a child, taught through her example… through her patience… through her grace… One of these precious lessons, a simple yet profound lesson for a child, related to the degree of value we should really be placing on ‘things’, on material possessions…I was reminded of this again a few weeks ago. Rachel was having an afternoon nap and Christian, my husband and I were making lunch together in the kitchen. A bottle slipped out of my husband’s hand and shattered all over the tiled floor, exploding into hundreds of tiny glass shards. Christian spun around, “What happened?” he asked. I found my mom’s words echoing through my lips. Words which I had heard so many times (given that we were five children- I had heard them plenty!) “It’s just a bottle, these things happen. As long as no one was hurt, it doesn’t matter.” Rachel, having been awakened by the loud crash, stumbled still sleepily into the kitchen, and said, “These things happen, hey mom?” … “Yes, my love, these things happen…” I recall a school friend whose home I would visit who would be lambasted each time she accidentally broke anything… A childhood encrusted in fear… a childhood restricted, restrained, bound…. My mother’s words gave us freedom… They didn’t give us permission to recklessly destroy property, and they didn’t negate the emotions of temporary sadness when an item which had been sentimental was irreparably damaged. Her words allowed us the autonomy to be children and to learn the value of the important versus the unimportant… “It’s only a material possession. As long as no one was hurt, it doesn’t matter. Material possessions are replaceable. You, my love, are not…” We have children…shatterings, crashings, explosions, breakages are bound to be frequent occurrences… Before the so often automatic reaction of shouting our frustration in the seconds immediately following these inevitable situations, even when sentimentality is involved… breathe…We need to consider the impact of our words, our tone, the message we are conveying…Things break, these things happen… May your reactions towards your children be an example of what really matters in life… Life itself…

With motherly love
Naomi ❤️

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