We wait… We wait in traffic, in shopping queues, for phone calls, for doctors’ appointments, for meetings, for flights, for friends to arrive, for children to finish school…. Fragments of life seem to be joined together by moments of waiting, and in the frustration we often want to speed these moments up, especially in a world where time is arguably the most sought after and valuable commodity.
That is, unless we turn this time into meaning, unless we make it valuable, unless we use the opportunity to connect, and turn these seemingly wasted times into memories, turn the fleeting to the lasting, the temporary to the engrained. We have the potential to make magic with these waiting moments, we can make sparkling diamonds which will last a lifetime by intentionally slowing the ‘wasted’ down and absorbing the magnificence that can be created within them.
As parents, we want to create a memory bank for our children that will stretch into their adulthood and beyond, and bring with it feelings of joy and immense happiness. Memories that will help them make sense of their childhood, and understand their value, both to us and the world. Memories with our children aren’t just created in the planned or the big events, the most precious memories can be created in these ‘wasted’ times, simply by making small moments intentional. These can take place and be made every day, wherever we are, at any time, even when we only have a minute to spare.
Whilst traveling back from Mozambique at the end of the July holidays, we spent a night in Swaziland to break the trip. It was a warm evening, and we sat in an outside lapa waiting for our meal to be served. Christian was running around, and Rachel had found a vinyl covered couch on the edge of the thatched serving area, and was lying down on it. She called over to me, “Mommy, come see the pretty stars”. I went over and squashed myself next to her, looking up at the bright night sky. I took her hand in mine, admiring with her the beauty above us. It could have been an ordinary moment in the midst of waiting, a quick glimpse above, but I took it in, and I became so aware of the awesomeness of it. I breathed more deeply, absorbing her closeness, taking in every second of the blessing it was to be her mother and experience her delight in the sparkles above. I took the opportunity to slow down the fleeting, slow down the ordinary, and be intentionally in the moment alongside her, turning dust into diamonds- a precious memory of bonding and connection. These moments hold magnitude, they are beautiful, and within these moments, created by waiting, lie memories that we will treasure our entire lives.
About two weeks ago, whilst waiting for the dinner to finish cooking, I was pottering around the kitchen. I looked over at Christian who was eyeing an Avo in the fruit bowl, and realized that once again, it had been a day of rushing, waiting, and time fast-forwarded from sunrise to sunset. I knew that the day had been so wasted with the typical buzz, that I hadn’t connected with my little boy and I risked him going to bed without knowing where his soul had been that day. I got on my knees and called him over, and he dashed across the kitchen and enveloped me in a tight embrace. We lingered a while, I breathed deeper, hugged harder and held onto the moment. It became a powerful connection, simply because I was conscious and intentional in the moment. These moments that we intentionally create with otherwise wasted time, not only become precious to us, but become diamonds in our children’s memory banks.
Whilst sitting around the dinner table a little later, I asked the children what their favourite part of the day was, as I always do. Rachel mentioned playing with friends and Christian began uttering, “Picking up …”(I knew he was going to say ‘seedpods’- one of his favourite activities- and that particular day he had picked up literally an entire Pick and Pay packet full of them at school). But then he stopped, looked at me, and said, “Mom, my favourite part of the day was that long hug in the kitchen just now”. A brief minute during the course of waiting… potentially wasted time… made into an intentional moment, and added to both of our memory banks. Dust… turned to diamonds.
Car trips to school, waiting in shop queues, waiting for dinner to cook, waiting in a lapa under the Swazi night sky. Wherever you are, and however ordinary the occasion or day may seem- just being, really being in the moment, has the power to turn these into the extraordinary and unforgettable. It has the power to turn them into the favourite parts of the day, and it adds them to the joyful and treasured memory bank of life.
Turn otherwise wasted and insignificant time into cherished memories and meaningful moments. All it takes is attention to the space you are in, intention to creating magic. In doing this, the plain is transformed into the magnificent; the wasted is recreated into treasure.
So breathe deeper… hug longer… be aware of the precious space you are in and have the capacity to create…and watch…. as moments turn from dust to diamonds.
#family
#relationships
#parenting
#mindfulness
#connecting
#selfworth
#resilience
#togetherness
#inthemoment